6 Apr 2013

# 6

And a re-work of yesterday's sonnet...but in 55 words, including title, just for G-Man.

In The Stillness


Only cloud reflections ripple to the music of the water -

until...

a sudden starling flock 
erupts
to mimic their movements -

flickering
shifting
splitting
covering the twilight canopy in monochrome lace...

short, lissome lines of birds

swirling
twisting
curling

then billowing into shapes like balloons inflating;
they fill our bemused vision.


N.B. The poetry groups I joined have been making me think about the placing of words on the page. Hoping to make it easier for any readers, when speaking the lines aloud, to  say the words as intended, I've played around with spacings, etc, but kept to my original idea of yesterday, but sadly, Blogger has its own idea of where some lines will be placed, and veto'd my spacings- but I'm trying again to insert them...

7 comments:

  1. Had to go back for a look at yesterday - what a sight! That video is the tops...

    ReplyDelete
  2. I love watching flocks of birds twist and turn. You've explained why.

    ReplyDelete
  3. It is so neat to watch! like your 55!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Well written for sure.
    I hear you about the spacing...drives me crazy too
    Hugs

    SueAnn

    ReplyDelete
  5. I've been hit with shit from the aviary lacework.
    It's pretty from afar...Way afar!!!
    Loved your birdy musings 55
    Thanks for playing, and have a Kick Ass Week-End

    ReplyDelete
  6. Yes..thank God it continues...a brand new chapter
    Hugs
    SueAnn

    ReplyDelete
  7. their fluidity is great !

    ReplyDelete