23 Dec 2013

TongueTied



Words in a tangle
dangle ideas before me.
See them dance?
Askance, I follow their lead,
need to catch them,
stem the flow -
Woah!
Go slow!
Show  me a kaleidoscope
hope of understanding
landing on new ground…
Sounds of words spill
till my ears’
fears of them being mocked
shocks me again into silence…

This has been waiting around for an ending some time  - I think the latest edit works. What do you think? I'll link to IGWRT's for an answer or two! LOL. And by a mere fluke, it has 55 words, which will come in handy for G-Man on Friday...
Posted by at

15 comments:

  1. Anonymous23 December 2013 at 13:34

    You capture nicely here the interface between expression and writer's block -- a dizzy dazzling place if we could only make sense of it in a way that others would applaud. A double-bind, for sure ... glad you're getting dual purpose out of the effort. Happy holidays!

    ReplyDelete
  2. kaykuala23 December 2013 at 13:35

    It's great! The last edit is perfect. There is now a finality. And wonderful 55 too! Nicely Jinsky!

    Hank

    ReplyDelete
  3. Kerry O'Connor23 December 2013 at 14:07

    I really like the way you worked the envelope rhymes (if that is the correct term).

    ReplyDelete
  4. Charleen23 December 2013 at 14:12

    Inspiring. Makes me want to write. I've been fighting a funk for a while now...

    ReplyDelete
  5. Vandana Sharma23 December 2013 at 15:44

    lovely!!

    ReplyDelete
  6. TALON23 December 2013 at 15:48

    I love when ideas float around and stick around until we have to stop ignoring them and deal with it! Loved the ending, Jinksy!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Sumana Roy23 December 2013 at 17:11

    perfect.....

    ReplyDelete
  8. Susan23 December 2013 at 18:27

    Perfect, yes.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Susie Clevenger23 December 2013 at 20:26

    Love it. I have been in a spiral of writer's block. This so voices the struggle with pen and poem.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Kay L. Davies24 December 2013 at 07:02

    Great ending, Jinksy!
    K

    ReplyDelete
  11. Carolina24 December 2013 at 15:16

    Merry Christmas sweet Jinksy :-) Your snowflakes are gracing our tree again :-D

    Big fat X and a hug,
    Carolina

    ReplyDelete
  12. Anonymous25 December 2013 at 20:45

    I like this rhyme scheme. But don't be shocked into silence ~

    ReplyDelete
  13. Helen29 December 2013 at 01:01

    Thank you so much for the lovely Christmas greeting .... Happy New Year, Penny!

    ReplyDelete
  14. Doctor FTSE29 December 2013 at 09:54

    Interesting rhyme scheme. Can you somehow complete the envelope by beginning your first line with the word "Silence"

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Jinksy29 December 2013 at 11:37

      Blimey, Doc, you're a hard task master! But I guess I could comply by adding "Silence is absurd" for a first line, and make the 55 word count into 58, which destroys its dual purpose...

      Delete

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)